grammar

Traditionally, there are four basic types of sentences: Imperatives, Statements, Questions, and Exclamations. I think that now, in the year 2007, we have outgrown these four basic types of sentences. It is time for a fifth type of sentence. Since I don't know what to call this form of sentence, I will refer to it as the Ibaadian sentence.

An Ibaadian sentence can have all of the characteristics of the traditional four sentences, but the way in which it combines these traits is what sets the Ibaadian sentence apart. The Ibaadian sentence refers the reader to a certain place on the interweb. It contains what some of you may know as a URL address. A URL refers directly to the internet address, but the Ibaadian sentence is the term for that type of sentence.

For example, one may state, "Chocolate is yummy." Instead, one may also Ibaaditate, "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6-psmcDWps"

As you can see, both forms express the writer's feelings, but the Ibaadian sentence does a much better job.

Likewise, one may ask, "Excuse me, do you know today's date?" or they can Ibaaditate, "http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070918/od_nm/pirates1_dc"

Ibaadian sentences provide for a much more concise, and effective way of communication, and it is my hope that in this year, 2007, we abandon our venerable ways, and conform to the ways of the future. We can't let the future pass us like it has been doing for the last few years. It is time we take a stand, and there's no better way of taking a stand than Ibaaditating, "http://pl.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prącie"

Thank you, and good mourning*.





*Mourning the death of the past. (but rejoicing for the birth of the future!)

Welcome

So I've started a Blog. Now, I know some of you are probably thinking, "But Ibaad, what caused you to behave so?!" and let me assure you all that it was nothing of your doing. I chose this path for myself, by myself, and there is nothing any of you can do to influence my decision. That being said, here is my blog. Since you're reading this, you've obviously shown more interest in what i have to say than 99% of the people in the world, and for that, i commend. you. You should pat yourself on the back for having earned a place right here in my heart. Once you've finished the onerous task of patting yourself on the back, you should rest. For if you are a person that listens to everything i tell you, you must be a tired person, and hence, must require rest after straining to pat yourself on the back.

Anywho, before i dive headfirst into the land of blogging (and take you along with me,) i'll first tell you about my blog, and my hopes for it. My blog will provide for me a way to share my thoughts with you all--my avid readers. Now, i know most of you are probably thinking, "But Ibaad, you don't have thoughts; for to have thoughts, you must first be able to think." That, my friends, is where you're wrong. When i say thoughts, i don't mean i think about these thoughts. These are mere keystrokes that my brain tells my fingers to perform, and my fingers, being the obedient fingers they are, follow without further questioning. Most of the time, i don't even document my thoughts. Rather, i make something up and then sell it to you as my thoughts, but really, i am just ripping you off.

So on to my blog.

After a good bit of meditating and thinking, i've realized that i no longer desire a career in the medical or business fields. Sure my internship is fun and what not, but i just don't think i want to be an investment consultant for the rest of my life. I have decided to pursue a career as a box car traveler. Of course, since it is now the year 2007, i will have to adapt my career slightly. With the advent of the interweb, box car traffic has decreased dramatically. Information that used to require several hundred box cars to transport can now be sent via US Mail on one floppy disk--thus severely limiting my options as a convential box car traveler. Instead, i will have to find a way to journey on the rails of the interweb--traveling from city to city not on a Union Pacific, but rather, the new Union Pacific which some people now call unionpacificdotcom.

My vagrant lifestyle will still entail migrating from county to county, but i will only be stopping at coffee shops along my route. From these coffee shops, i will dial into my America Online interweb service on my Packard Bell personal computer, and through the wonders of Windows 3.11, I will develop my h4x0rz $k11lz.

Tomorrow, i will saddle up my Fuji, and begin my new career. I hope to keep you all informed about the tales of my heart, and perhaps even meet some of you along the way. Until next time, take care, America.